The Sensitive Man
ndesky@hotmail.com (Robert Bendesky) (chuckle) A woman meets a man in a bar. They talk. They connect. They end up leaving together.more
Fish Heads
A customer at Green's Gourmet Grocery marveled at the proprietor's quick wit and intelligence. 'Tell me, Green, what makes you so smart?' 'I wouldn't share my secret with just anyone,' Green replies, lowering his voice so the other shoppers won't hear.more
Canibal Test
Three men were lost in the forest and later captured by cannibals. The cannibal king told the prisoners that they could live if they passed a trial. The first step of the trial was to go to the forest with the cannibals and get 10 pieces of fruit.more
Doctor's Love
One night a man and a woman are both at a bar knocking back a few beers. They start talking and come to realize that they're both doctors. After about an hour, the man says to the woman, 'Hey. How about if we sleep together tonight.more
Things Not To Say
Things not to say to a naked woman 1. Cool, Ive never been to the Grand Canyon. 2. How many storage boxes can you fit in there? 3. You must be very experienced. 4. Remember, you said this was a freebie&right?more
Christmas Tatoo
A woman goes into a tattoo parlor and tells the tattoo artist that she wants a tattoo of a turkey on her right thigh, right up just below her bikini line. She also wants him to put 'Happy Thanksgiving' under the turkey.more
Urgent Message
This blonde goes to the Western Union office and says, 'I just have to get an urgent message to my mother in Europe.' The clerk says it will be $100, and she replies 'But I don't have any money.... and I must get a message to her, it's urgent!...more
Playing Roulette
An african ambassador visited Russia and was entertained by his opposite number, the Russian ambassador. For three days, the African ambassador was wined, dined, and generally treated to the best hospitality that Russia had to offer.more
Club Championship
An older couple are playing in the annual club championship. They are playing in a playoff hole and it is down to a 6 inch putt that the wife has to make. She takes her stance and her husband can see her trembling.more
Love For 365 Days
TO MY DEAR WIFE, During the past year I have tried to make love to you 365 times. I have succeeded 36 times, which is an average of once every ten days. The following is a list of wyh I did not succeed more often: 54 times the sheets were clean.more
JOKE OF THE DAY A woman and a baby were in the doctorâEURs examinin More
A woman and a baby were in the doctor's examining room, waiting for the doctor to come in. The doctor arrived, examined the baby, checked his weight and found it somewhat below normal. The doctor asked if the baby was breast fed or bottle fed.more
On A Lonely Island
A guy is stranded on an island with only a Doberman and a pig for company. There's plenty of food and water, and the weather is beautiful, so he's doing alright - but after a few months he gets lonely...more
JOKE OF THE DAY Man wearing stovepipe hat More
An older man wearing a stovepipe hat, a waistcoat and a phony beard sat down at a bar and ordered a drink.more
Emergency Landing
Two guys were sitting in a bar getting really drunk. After awhile, just drinking gets boring, so the first guy looks at the second guy and says, 'Hey, you want to go up for a ride in my airplane?' The second guy says, 'Wow, you have an airplane?more
JOKE OF THE DAY A grade school teacher was asking students ... More
A grade school teacher was asking students what their parents did for a living. 'Tim, you're first,' she said. 'What does your mother do all day?' Tim stood up and proudly said, 'She's a doctor.' 'That's wonderful. How about you, Amie?more
JOKE OF THE DAY How many Californians does it take to screw ... More
How many Californians does it take to screw in a light bulb?more
Memories From Court
Reported in the Massachusetts Bar Association Lawyers Journal, the following are questions actually asked of witnesses by attorneys during trials and, in certain cases, the responses given by insightful witnesses: 1. 'Now doctor, isn't it true thatmore
The Lost Son
A guy was in a supermarket when he noticed an old lady following him around. Whenever he stopped, she stopped, and she also kept staring at him.more
JOKE OF THE DAY A devoted wife had spent her lifetime taking... More
A devoted wife had spent her lifetime taking care of her husband. Now he had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet she stayed by his bedside every single day. When he came to his senses, he motioned for her to come near him.more
JOKE OF THE DAY A man decided to march in the holy crusades... More
A man decided to march in the holy crusades. Concluding that his wife should wear a chastity belt while he is gone, he locks up her nether regions and gives the key to his best friend.more
Hospital Charts
Actual writings on hospital charts: 1. she has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night. 2. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.more
JOKE OF THE DAY A Rabbi and a Priest buy a car together and ... More
A Rabbi and a Priest buy a car together and it's being stored at the Priest's house. One day the Rabbi goes over to use the car and he sees him sprinkling water on it.more